A topic I often find myself discussing with my fellow women is the phenomen in our societies that makes some women compete with each other instead of offering acceptance and support to one another. And most of the times I come to a conclusion that some women feel threaned by others. 

Ive met plenty of women through my life that have way too many times compared themselves to one another. And try to put each other down in order to feel better about themseles. With clothes, makeup, body type, money, jobs, boyfriends… you name it… And I remember in my teenage years being so frustrated about this. Mostly, cause it was very unusual behaviour to me.

 The older I got the quicker I realied that these women were in fact stuck in a behaviour which they were taught from an early age. The truth is that they were suffering from views of others that were forced upon them.

Our socities teaches girls from the start that they will never will be good enough, no matter how hard they try…

These forces create a picture in girls minds that they will never be accepted for who they truly are. And this thinking pattern follows them almost throughout their whole lives. Girls are poisoned by the norm through media that they have to look and act in a certain way in order to be accepted by the outside world.

In order to become accepted for who they are,  they look for validation outside instead of looking from within and trying to become aware of the forces that are holding them back from being okay with themselves.


This causes frustration and resentment that later is pushed outside on other peers.

Trying to compete with other females to get ahead, just to feel better about yourself is never the way to live piecefully.

Why is it that we poison our daughters with hate, resentment and fear from such an early age?

Is it because we suffer from the same complexes that were forced upon us?

Why dont we teach them to love themselves and others just for who they are?

If we were are truly okay with ourselves then there definetely wouldnt be a need to compete with others or look for validation from outside. The reality is that nobody can be compared. There can only be one of you and one of me, we re all different and that is okay.

Instead of competing with one another shouldnt we be investing our time in finding ways to accept ourselves with flaws and all and inspire others to do the same?

If we take the time to create conversation, we will open the possibilities to actually make a difference. But if we never talk about this then we also take part of the norm that will allow this poisonous pattern to keep on going from one generation to another…


I shot this look with the amazing Maya Nestorov. Be sure to check out her very inspiring blog about holistic health and inner happiness!


Dress H&M

Coat Vero Moda

Over Knee Boots Vagabond

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  • Tina Masatu

    This is such an important topic! Thank you for writing this post, it truly is our job to teach the next generation of young ladies that their light does not diminish when their fellow woman rises to the top. In fact, she is then in a position to help you up! Keep on being a role model to people near and far. Great post! <3

  • I’ve been looking forward to reading this! Love that you are talking about it an love that you remind us all to look within! I teach my daughter to be the best she can be and it’s definitely NOT based on the comparison to others! Great post and LOVE this shoot x

    Tatyana x